Alone With My Thoughts, Floating In Nothingness
Days before the election, I made an appointment to spend two hours in an isolation tank, also known as a sensory deprivation tank. If you’re unfamiliar, it’s essentially a relatively sound-proof enclosure with absolutely no light, filled with water that contains about a thousand pounds of epsom salt. If you’ve been to the Dead Sea in Israel, you know how this works. You float face-up and due to the density of the water, you effortlessly float.
I had known about the tanks, which historically have been used primarily for therapy. Over the last year I started reading and hearing about people opening float facilities across the world where anyone could go to experience a tank. Think of them as floatation spas. I actually wouldn’t be surprised if spas started adding them to the mix. A company called Float Lab Technologies manufactures the tanks and also have a couple of facilities in Los Angeles. I didn’t want to read reviews, talk to anyone or really know much more than I already did. I just wanted to do it.
I was definitely a little anxious going into it. It wasn’t so much about it being two hours, which I don’t really consider to be a long time. It was more about the fact that I knew I was going to hallucinate and I wasn’t sure how I would respond to it psychologically. I was worried about having some sort of bad trip or a panic attack. It wasn’t enough to keep me from wanting to do it though. After putting in some earplugs that were provided, rinsing off in a shower, I opened a thick, heavy door for what seemed like a walk-in refrigerator, stepped into the lukewarm, humid blackness and closed the door behind me. I squatted down in the pitch-black darkness, let my feet go out from under me and laid on my back. I wasn’t sure where I wanted my arms — outstretched, behind my head, folded loosely on my belly or by my side.
Floating with them at my side, I just stared into the nothing trying to orient myself to the size of the tank and relax. I noticed a slight burning sensation where my body was in the water. After some time that went away. I could feel my heart beating prominently and for some time, that’s what I focused on. Growing up with two therapists as parents, I learned about biofeedback at an early age and use it as a path to relaxation even today. I also practiced Buddhism for eight years or so, meditating twice a day, nearly every day. If I can focus and I’m not dealing with a lot of anxiety, I can get myself in a completely relaxed state pretty quickly. When I did reach that point in the tank, that’s when the experience really started.
My eyes were closed and when I opened them it was still black, but I began to see cloud-like patterns or smoke billowing in an almost cartoon animated way. My eyes were closed and open for periods of time for which I had absolutely no concept. I was in and out of what felt like a nearly sleeping state, floating in what felt like complete weightlessness. I felt outside of myself at times — not looking down on myself, but not myself. Every so often I would become aware that I was floating in a slightly viscous liquid, but most of the time it felt like air or, rather, nothing. The visual hallucinations became more animated, but never reached anything approaching scary or panic-inducing. If nothing else, it seemed to push me further into complete relaxation. The most difficult thing was letting all of the noisy thoughts swirling in my head just swirl away.
I lost all track of time and I didn’t care. I do remember consciously wondering at one point how long I had been in the tank and just as quickly, the thought dissipated. The few times I moved once I was in the relaxed state, I noticed dried salt on my body and the water felt somewhat almost slimy.
I felt high and a little disoriented when I finally stepped out of the tank. I showered the salt off, got dressed and stepped outside, literally onto the Venice boardwalk which was a shock to the system. It felt like I was walking a lot slower than everyone else. I felt invisible and disassociated but incredibly relaxed. It lasted the rest of the afternoon and into the evening. I feel different, high even. While I probably won’t make another appointment anytime soon, it’s definitely something I want to do again and I would encourage anyone curious to seek out a local facility and give it a try. While you certainly don’t have to do it for two hours, I can’t imagine doing it for less time.
